The “I” and the Being
In regards to psychological subject-matter, we must make a precise differentiation between the “I” and the Being. The “I” is not the Being, nor the Being is the “I.” Regardless, everybody says, “my Being.” Everybody thinks about their Being, yet no one knows what the Being is, thus they end up mistaking the Being for the “I.”
When we knock at a door, if somebody questions us saying, “Who is it?” We always answer saying, “It is ‘I.’” In this we do not commit an error and the answer is exact. But when we say, “My entire being is sad, ill, tired, etc.,” then indeed, we clumsily err because the wretched intellectual animal falsely called “human being” still does not possess the Being.
Only the Being can do, yet the human machine, the wretched intellectual animal, is not capable of doing anything; everything happens to him. He is a simple mechanical toy moved by forces that he does not know. The intellectual animal has the delusion of doing something, but indeed he does nothing: everything happens through him. They beat us and we react by beating. They harass us to pay the rent for the house, then we react anxiously looking for money. Somebody hurts our self-esteem, then we react by committing madness, etc.
The wretched intellectual animal is always a victim of circumstances, and is not capable of consciously originating circumstances, but he wrongly believes that he actually originates them. Indeed, only the Being (the Innermost), can consciously determine circumstances, yet regrettably, the intellectual animal falsely called “human being” still does not possesses the Being (the Innermost).
Many students from pseudo-occult, pseudo-esoteric schools, full of refined metaphysical ambitions, commit the error of dividing their beloved “I” into two arbitrary and absurd halves. They qualify the first half as Superior “I,” and they contemptuously watch the second half, saying, “That is the Inferior ‘I.’” What is most intriguing of all of this—what is simultaneously the most comical and tragic—is to see that wretched Inferior “I” desperately fighting to evolve and perfect himself in order to someday achieve the longed for union with the Superior “I.”
The wretched mind of the intellectual animal is ludicrous when fabricating the Superior “I,” when conferring divine attributes onto it, when giving it arbitrary powers in order to control the mind and the heart. The same “I” dividing itself into two; the same “I” wanting to amalgamate itself after having divided itself into two; the same “I” splitting and wanted to join again. The ambitions of the “I” has no limits, it wants and wishes to become a Master, Deva, God, etc.
The “I” splits itself into two in order to join again and become one; thus, this is how the “I” mistakenly believes that it can see its super-divine ambitions fulfilled. All of these tricks of the “I” are fine deceits of the mind, trivialities without any value whatsoever. The mind fabricates the comical Superior “I” to its taste, dresses it as a Mahatma, names it with a sonorous name, and thereafter exalts himself, falling into mythomania.
We knew the case of a mythomaniac that let his beard and hair grow long, then he dressed in a Jesus-type of Christian robe and told the whole world that he was no less than the very reincarnation of Jesus Christ. Naturally, there were many imbeciles who not only worshiped him but who still continue to worship him.
When having the bad taste of fabricating the Superior “I” as a separated and super-divine entity, the mind falsifies reality, mistakenly supposing that entity is the Being, the Innermost, the Reality. The mind arbitrarily wants that Superior “I”—fabricated by itself —to be the Being. Thus, the mind stupidly grants to that Superior “I” things fabricated by itself, things that have nothing to do with the Being. These trivialities of the mind are similar to the falsification of currencies; the mind falsifies a false Being, thus that counterfeit bill is the Superior “I.” Mythomaniacs have a terrible and frightful self-esteem. They live very attached to themselves. They worship their false coin, their so-boasted Superior “I.”
Every mythomaniac is a ludicrous psychopath. Every mythomaniac overestimates himself excessively and considers himself to be a God that people are obligated to worship. Nevertheless, not all of those who fabricate a Superior “I” fall into mythomania. Fanatics abound who are not mythomaniacs, and who only aspire to evolve in order to attain union with their Superior “I.” Those fanatics do not eat a single piece of meat nor do they drink a glass of wine, and they frightfully criticize anyone who eats a tiny piece of meat or who has a glass of wine in his hand ready to make a toast. Those fanatics are unbearable. As a general rule they are one hundred percent vegetarian; they believe themselves to be very holy, even when in their home they are cruel with their spouse, their children, etc. Those people love to fornicate, adulterate, covet, lust, nonetheless they believe they are very holy.
The mind only serves as a hindrance to the Being (the Innermost). The mind does not know anything about Reality. If thought knew Reality—the Innermost, the Being—then all people would already be comprehensive.
We can experience the Being, the Innermost, only through profound meditation. The experience of the Being, the Innermost, transforms us radically. Outrageously, the mythomaniacs usually falsify such an experience with unconscious, mental self-projections that they rush to tell the whole world. Mythomaniacs are usually victims of self-deceit, thus, believing themselves to be Gods, they long for the whole world to worship them.
It is completely impossible to experience the Being—the Innermost, the Reality—without becoming true technical and scientific masters of that mysterious science called meditation. It is completely impossible to experience the Being—the Innermost, the Reality—without having reached a true mastery of the quietude and silence of the mind. Nevertheless, we must not deceive ourselves and be ready to buy a pig in a poke, since the “I” also lusts for and covets those silences, and it even fabricates them artificially.
We need calm and total silence of the mind during profound meditation. Nonetheless, we do not need that false quietude and silence fabricated by the “I.” Listen, we must not forget that when the devil celebrates Mass, with his sermon he deceives even the most astute people.
It is logical to state that if we are moved by the greed of experiencing the Being, and we want to silence the mind by force, on a whim, if we want to calm it by torturing it and fastening it, then we will only obtain artificial silences and arbitrary quietudes produced by the “I.” Whosoever truly wants a legitimate silence and not a false silence, a true quietude and not a false quietude, must be integral—that is, to not commit the error of dividing himself between subject and object, thinker and thought, “I” and not “I,” controller and controlled, Superior “I” and Inferior “I,” me and my thoughts, etc.
To know how to meditate is to be on the path of inner illumination. If we want to learn how to meditate, we must comprehend that between me and my thoughts—in other words, between thinker and thought—there is no difference whatsoever.
The human mind is not the brain. The brain is made to elaborate thought, but it is not thought. The mind is energetic and subtle, but we commit the error of dividing ourselves into thousands of small mental fragments, which in their conjunction compose that which is the legion of the pluralized “I.”
During meditation, when we try to unite all of those mental fragments with the healthy purpose of becoming integral, then all of those fragments form another great fragment against which we must fight; here then, the quietude and silence of the mind becomes impossible. Therefore, during meditation we must not divide ourselves between Superior “I” and Inferior “I,” me and my thoughts, my mind and “I,” because the mind and “I,” my thoughts and “I,” are all one: the ego, the pluralized “I,” the self-willed, etc.
When we truly comprehend that the Superior “I” and Inferior “I,” as well as my thoughts and “I”, etc., are all the ego, the self-willed, it is clear that by means of basic comprehension we liberate ourselves from dualistic thought, thus the mind is then truly quiet and in a profound silence. Only when the mind is really quiet, only when the mind is in a true silence, can we then experience that which is the Reality, that which is the authentic Being, the Innermost.
It is totally impossible to become integral while the mind is bottled within dualism. The Essence of the mind (the Buddhata) is most precious, but regrettably it is bottled in the battle of antitheses. During meditation, when the Essence of the mind escapes from the bottle of the opposites, we can then experience the Reality, the Being, the Innermost.
There is dualism when I try to reunite all the fragments of my mind in one. There is dualism when my mind is enslaved by good and evil, cold and heat, big and small, pleasant and unpleasant, yes and no, etc. There is also dualism when we divide ourselves between Superior “I” and Inferior “I,” and when we yearn for the Superior “I” to control us during meditation.
Whosoever has experienced the Being at some time during meditation is cured forever of the danger of falling into mythomania. The Being—the Innermost, the Reality—is totally different from that which the pseudo-occultists and pseudo-esotericists call Superior “I” or Divine “I.”
The experience of Reality is completely different, distinct from everything the mind has experienced, ever. The experience of Reality cannot be communicated to anybody because it does not look like anything that the mind has experienced before. When one has experienced Reality, one then comprehends very deeply the disastrous state in which one is abiding, and then one only aspires to know oneself without wanting to become more than one is.
At the present time, the wretched intellectual animal falsely called “human being” only has one useful element inside. This element is the Buddhata, the Essence of the mind, with which we can experience the Being, the Innermost, the Reality. This precious element is trapped in the bottle of the animal intellect. During profound inner meditation, when the mind is totally quiet and in an absolute silence—within and without, not only in the superficial level, but also in all the different corridors, subconscious extracts, zones and lands—then the Essence, the precious element, escapes from within the bottle and fuses with the Being, the Innermost, in order to experience Reality.