The Dissolution of the Ego
Respectable friends, dear ladies, today, December 9th, in the tenth year of Aquarius, we meet here once again in this place with the longing to profoundly study the theme of the dissolution of the psychological “I.”
First of all, it is indispensable for us to carefully analyze this subject-matter about the ego, given that diverse pseudo-esoteric, pseudo-occultist schools emphasize the disheveled idea of the coexistence of a double “I.” The first part they call the Superior “I.” The second part they qualify as Inferior “I.” Yet, we state that superior and inferior are two sections of the same thing.
Yes, they have spoken much about the “Alter-ego,” and they even praise it or deify it, considering it divine. Yet, in the name of the truth, it is indispensable to state that the Superior “I” and Inferior “I” are two aspects of the same ego. Therefore, it is undoubtedly incongruent to praise the Superior “I” and belittle the Inferior.
Thus, by directly focusing on this subject-matter, by looking at the ego as it really is in itself and without any types of arbitrary divisions into superior and inferior, it is clear that we then can perform a correct differentiation between what the “I” is and what the Being is.
Nonetheless, it could be objected that such a differentiation is nothing more than another concept elaborated by the intellect. Yes, those who read this will be evasive by affirming that one more or one less philosophical concept is something that does not have the least importance. Moreover, some even give themselves the luxury of reading these affirmations and thereafter forgetting them so they may pay attention to something that for them is indeed considered important.
Yes, people of sleeping consciousness often abandon accounting for these types of affirmations, owing to the fact that they already are tired of so much theory. So, those people say to themselves: What does one more theory matter? What does one less theory matter?
Therefore, we must talk with complete frankness and based on facts, on direct experiences, and not on simple subjective types of opinions. Thus, my friends, I will tell you what I experienced, what I have seen and heard, and if you want to accept my affirmations, you are welcome to do so, yet if you want to reject them, it is your business, since all human beings are free to accept, reject, or interpret the teachings as they wish.
Listen, in the beginning of my present reincarnation, I—like many of you—also had read several pseudo-esoteric and pseudo-occultist books. Thus, searching—as you have—I passed through diverse schools and knew a great quantity of theories. So, it is obvious that because of so much reading and rereading, I also came to believe in the existence of two “I’s”—the Superior “I” and the Inferior “I.” Then, different preceptors taught me that one has to dominate the Inferior “I” by means of the Superior “I,” this, they said, in order to someday achieve Adepthood. Thus, frankly and openly I confess that I was completely convinced of the existence of the so-called two “I’s,” until fortunately a transcendental mystical event came to intensely shake me at the very bottom of my soul.
So, one night—it does not matter what year, day, or hour—when being present in a completely cognizant and positive manner outside of my physical body, my real Inner Being, the Innermost, came to me. Thus, smiling, the Blessed One said, “You have to die.” These words uttered by the Innermost left me perplexed, confused, astounded.
Thus, a little bit scared, I interrogated my Inner Being (Atman), as follows, “Why do I have to die? Let me live a little bit longer; I am working for humanity…”
I still remember the moment when, smiling, the Blessed one repeated unto me for a second time, “You have to die.”
Thereafter, within the Astral Light, the Adorable One showed me that which ought to die within myself. Thus, this is how I then saw the pluralized “I” formed by a multitude of tenebrous entities, a true cluster of perverse creatures, distinct types of psychic aggregates, living demons personifying errors. Thus, my friends, it was in this manner that I came to know that the “I” is not something individual, but a sum of psychic aggregates, a multiple sum of quarrelsome and noisy “I’s,” some representing anger, others greed, these lust, those envy, these others pride, continuing with those others of laziness, gluttony, together with their infinitude of derivatives. So, indeed, regarding the ego, I did not see anything worthy of being adored, nor any type of divinity, etc.
Anyhow, when arriving at this point of my exposition, it would not be strange that some of our readers will object to my concepts by stating, “It is possible that you, sir, saw your Inferior “I,” which is a sum of psychic aggregates [skandhas], as oriental Buddhism categorizes them. However, how different your concept would have been if you had perceived your Superior “I” in all of his greatness.”
Yes, my friends, I know very well the diverse forms of intellectualization that you possess, your evasiveness, your elusiveness, your distinct justifications, your reactions, your resistances, the desire of always making everything that has the flavor of ego stand out. It is clear that the ego does not wish to die, and when the ego does not want to continue to exist in its denser and gross forms, it wishes to do so in some exquisitely subtle form. Indeed, nobody wants to see their beloved “I” reduced to cosmic dust, just like that, because any given fellow said it in a lecture hall. So, it is quite normal that the ego does not wish to die and that it looks for comfortable philosophies that will provide it a space in heaven, a place on the altars of churches, or a place filled with infinite happiness within the beyond.
Alas, we truly regret disheartening people, but regarding these very serious matters we have no other choice but to speak bluntly, frankly, and sincerely. Consequently, given that we Gnostics like to talk based on concrete, clear, and definitive facts, now, with the purpose of demonstrating that the Superior “I” does not exist, I have no inconvenience in narrating another unusual event.
Listen, on another given day, while in profound meditation, in accordance with all the rules given in Jnana Yoga, I became immersed within that state that is known as Nirvi-Kalpa-Samadhi. Then I abandoned all my supersensible bodies and thus, converted into a dragon of wisdom, I penetrated within the world of the Solar Logos.
In such Logoic moments, which are beyond the body, the affections, and the mind, I wanted to know something about the life of the great Kabir Jesus. Thus, precisely in those very moments, I witnessed myself transformed into Jesus of Nazareth performing miracles and wonders in the holy land. I still remember the moment when I was baptized by John in the river Jordan. I witnessed myself inside a temple located at the shores of that river. The Precursor was dressed in a beautiful robe, and when approaching him, he steadily looked at me and exclaimed, “Jesus, take off your robe, because I am going to baptize you.”
Thus, I walked towards the interior of the sanctuary. Then John, while pouring the anointing oil and a little bit of water upon my head, prayed. Thereafter, I felt myself transformed. What happened afterwards was marvelous. While seated inside a vestibule, I saw three divine suns. The first was blue, which corresponds to the Father. The second was yellow, which corresponds to the Son. And the third was red, which corresponds to the Holy Spirit. Lo and behold, the three Logoi: Brahma, Vishnu, and Shiva.
When withdrawing from such a Logoic ecstatic state and returning into my physical body, my confusion was unbearable. “What…? Am I Jesus of Nazareth; am I the Christ?” Bless my soul, oh God, and Hail Mary! How is it that I, a miserable slug from the mud of the Earth, I, who am not even worthy of untying the sandals of the Master Jesus of Nazareth, was transformed just like that into him?
Thus, overwhelmingly absorbed in thought because of all of this, I resolved once again to enter into meditation and repeat that mystical experience. Yet now, only changing in it my longing motive, that is, instead of wanting to know something about the life of Jesus, I was concerned about John and how he baptized the Nazarene.
Thus, the same mystical state unleashed itself within me. Again I abandoned all my supersensible bodies and once more I was within that Logoic state. Thus, abiding within that Logoic state, I fixed my attention with greater intensity on John the Baptist. Then, lo and behold, I witnessed myself transformed into John and performing the activities of the Precursor; that is, baptizing Jesus, etc.
When withdrawing from that Logoic ecstasy and returning into my physical body, I comprehended that within the world of the Logos, in the world of Christ, there does not exist any type of Superior “I” nor Inferior “I.” It is urgent for all of those here present to comprehend that within Christ all beings are one, thus the heresy of separation is the worst of heresies.
Thus, friends of mine, everything in this world in which we live is passing by: ideas are passing by, persons are passing by, things are passing by. The only thing that is stable and permanent is the Being, and the reason for the Being to be is to be the Being himself.
Hence, make a distinction between the essential nature of the “I” and the essential nature of the Being.
Question: Master, of what substance are the psychic aggregates which constitute the myself made?
Samael Aun Weor: Ladies and gentlemen, it is indispensable for you to comprehend what the mind and its functions are.
The intellectual animal, mistakenly called human, still does not possess an individual mind, because he has not created it, he has not built it. The Mental Body, properly speaking, can only be created by means of sexual transmutations. I want all of you here present to understand that the Sexual Hydrogen Ti-12 exists within the sacred sperm. Thus, undoubtedly, the esotericist who does not spill the cup of Hermes (who does not ejaculate the semen) in fact originates marvelous transmutations of the libido within his organism, whose outcome is the creation of the individual Mental Body. The Manas, the mental substance, properly speaking, is found in the interior of any individual, yet that mental substance is lacking individuality. That Manas possesses diverse forms, it is found constituted in the shape of aggregates [skandhas]. These have never been unknown to esoteric Buddhism.
Please, I beg this friendly audience who listens to me, to follow in patience the course of my dissertation…
All of those multiple, quarrelsome, and noisy “I’s”—which in their conjunction form the myself, the self-willed—are constituted by more or less condensed mental substance. Now you can explain for yourselves the reason why every person is constantly changing opinion. For example: we are real estate salespersons, and some clients approach; we talk to them, we convince them of the necessity of buying a beautiful residence, such fellows become enthusiastic and emphatically affirm that in fact they will buy such residence and that nothing can make them to desist from their decision. Unfortunately, after a few hours, everything changes. The opinion of the client is no longer the same, since another mental “I” is now controlling the brain, and the enthusiastic “I” that a few hours earlier was impassioned with the purchase of the property is now displaced by a new “I” that has nothing to do with such a deal nor with the given word. Thus, this is how the castle of cards falls to the ground and the wretched real estate agent feels deceived.
The “I” that swears eternal love to a woman is displaced tomorrow by another “I” that has nothing to do with the oath. Thus, the man withdraws, leaving the woman disheartened.
The “I” that swears loyalty to the Gnostic Movement is displaced tomorrow by another “I” that has nothing to do with the oath. Thus, the person withdraws from Gnosis, leaving all the brothers and sisters of the sanctuary confused and astounded.
See for yourselves, dear friends of mine, what the infinite forms of the mind are, in what manner they control the capital centers of the brain, and how they play with the human machine.
Question: Master, on this planet on which we live, the “I’s” make our life bearable, since it is easy to comprehend that if we dissolve them, we will then withdraw from everything that relates to our desires, thus our life will be terribly sad and boring. Is that not so?
Samael Aun Weor: Respectable ladies and gentlemen, authentic happiness is radically based on the reevaluation of the Being. It is unquestionable that the Being experiences authentic happiness each time he undergoes an intimate reevaluation.
Unfortunately, people of this day and age confuse pleasure as happiness. They bestially enjoy fornication, adultery, alcohol, drugs, money, gambling, etc.
The end of pleasure is pain. Thus, every type of animal pleasure is transformed into bitterness.
Obviously, the elimination of the ego reevaluates the Being, producing happiness as an outcome. Regrettably, the consciousness imprisoned within the ego does not understand, does not comprehend the necessity for the inner reevaluation, and prefers animal enjoyments, because it firmly believes that such is happiness.
Dissolve the pluralized “I” so that you can experience the happiness of the reevaluation of the Being.
Question: Master, based on everything that has been formerly exposed, it seems to us that the necessity to form a Mental Body in order not to have so many minds is evident and unpostponable?
Samael Aun Weor: I will answer the question of the gentleman at once. Indeed, as we have already stated in this lecture, the intellectual animal, mistakenly called human, does not possess an individual mind, since instead of one mind the humanoid has many minds, and this is different. What I am affirming may displease many pseudo-esotericists and pseudo-occultists since they are completely convinced by the theories that they have read. Those theories affirm that the rational homunculus possesses a Mental Body.
Allow us the liberty to dissent against such affirmations. If the intellectual animal had an individual mind, if he truly did not possess those diverse mental aggregates that characterize him, he would have continuity of purpose. Thus, everyone would keep his given word. No one would affirm today and deny tomorrow. The presumed buyer from our former example, after having given his word, would return the following day with cash in hand. To that end, Earth would be a paradise.
Therefore, if we want the authentic reevaluation of the inner Being, it is urgent to create the Mental Body and to dissolve the pluralized “I.” Only those sacred reevaluations can grant true happiness unto us.
Question: Venerable Master, is it possible that a person who gives money to the church, who reads the Bible, who goes to confession, who perform works of charity at institutions, who spreads the gospel, who only has one wife and other virtues, can also have “I’s?”
Samael Aun Weor: Respectable ladies and gentlemen, allow me to inform you that the “I” disguises itself as a saint, as a martyr, as an apostle, as a good husband, as a good wife, as a mystic, as a penitent, as an anchorite, as charitable, splendid, etc.
Crime is also hidden within the delectable cadence of a verse. Crime is also hidden within the perfumes of the temple. Adultery and fornication is committed at the shadow of the cross, and the worst abject criminals assume pietistic poses, sublime figures, martyr-like features, etc.
It is good to know that many virtuous people possess very strong psychic aggregates. Remember that there exists a great deal of virtue within the wicked, and a great deal of evil within the righteous.
There are many mystics, anchorites, penitents within the abyss, within the nine Dantesque circles, who believe that are doing very well. Therefore, do not be surprised that even within the abyss exist exemplary priests who are followed by their devotees.
Question: Master, what is the spiritual value of the good intentions of a sincere person who lives mistakenly?
Samael Aun Weor: Very friends of mine, I will gladly answer this very interesting question from the audience.
Remember that the path that leads to the abyss is paved with good intentions. “For many are called, but few are chosen.” (Matthew 22:14)
The wicked from all epochs have had good intentions. Hitler, filled with magnificent intentions, trampled upon many nations, and because of him millions of people died within the gas chambers or in the concentration camps or on the execution walls or within filthy dungeons. Undoubtedly, this monster wanted triumph for great Germany, thus he did not waste any type of efforts to this effect.
Nero burned Rome on behalf of his art, with mystical intentions of making the lyre resound universally. Thus, with the longing of liberating his people from “Christianity,” which he considered an epidemic or a scourge, he was throwing the Christians into the Roman circus so that the lions would devour them
The executioner that fulfills an unjust command has magnificent intentions when he kills his fellowman. Millions of heads fell to the guillotine during the French Revolution, and the executioners worked with magnificent intentions because they wanted the triumph of the people. Robespierre, filled with magnificent intentions, led many innocent people to the gallows.
Likewise, we must not forget what the Holy Inquisition was. The inquisitors, with magnificent intentions, condemned many wretched people to the fire, the torture rack, martyrdom.
Thus, I want you, ladies and gentlemen, to comprehend that what is important are the good deeds and not the good intentions that can be more or less mistaken.
The judges of Karma within the tribunals of objective justice judge the souls based on deeds, based on the clear and definitive concrete actions, and not by their good intentions.
Results are what always count. Thus, it is useless to have good intentions if the results of our actions are catastrophic.
Question: Master, what is the procedure to follow in order to liberate ourselves from the psychological defects that so torture our mind?
Samael Aun Weor: Honorable audience, if we truly want to avoid the descent into the infernal worlds, it is urgent, undelayable, and unpostponable to annihilate the ego, to reduce it to ashes in a voluntary and conscious manner.
I want you to know that when in relation with people, when coexisting with our relatives or with our fellow workers, etc., our hidden defects spontaneously emerge, and if we are in a state of alert perception, alert novelty, we see them just as they really are in themselves.
Any discovered defect must be judiciously submitted to analysis through in-depth meditation, with the purpose of comprehended it in a unitotal, integral manner.
It is not enough to comprehend a defect. One has to delve even deeper. It is indispensable to explore ourselves in order to find the intimate roots of the defect that we have comprehended, that is, until apprehending its deep significance.
Any spark of consciousness can immediately illuminate us, and in millionths of a second truly apprehend the deep significance of that comprehended defect.
Elimination is different. Someone can have comprehended some psychological error and even have apprehended its deep significance, and nonetheless continue with that “I” within the different departments of the mind, since without its elimination it is not possible to be free from such and such an error.
Thus, when one wants to die from instant to instant and from moment to moment, elimination is vital, cardinal, and definitive.
Nonetheless, with the mind we cannot extirpate our errors. Listen: by means of our understanding we can only label our diverse psychological defects, thus giving them different names, juggling them from one level into another level of our subconsciousness, hiding them from ourselves, judging them, excusing them, etc., but it is not possible to fundamentally alter them or to extirpate them.
Thus, if what we truly want is to eliminate errors and to die within ourselves here and now, then a power superior to the mind is necessary. Then, we need to appeal to a transcendental power. Fortunately, such a superior power is found latent in all human creatures. I want to address the Kundalini, the igneous serpent of our magical powers.
During complete chemical copulation, we can beg our particular Divine Mother to eliminate the psychological error that we have not only comprehended but also apprehended its deep significance. You can be sure that our particular cosmic mother, holding the spear of Eros, will mortally wound the psychic aggregate that personifies the error that we need to eliminate. This sacred spear, a marvelous emblem of the creative energy, is precisely the weapon with which Devi Kundalini will eliminate from us the defect that we want to annihilate here and now.
Naturally, the elimination of those aggregates is performed in a progressive manner, since many of them are processed within the 49 levels of the subconsciousness. This means that any psychological defect is represented by thousands of psychic aggregates that are begotten and developed within the 49 subconscious levels of the mind.
It could be that someone is not a fornicator in the intellectual zone and nonetheless be a fornicator in the more profound zones of the subconsciousness. Yes, many mystics who were extremely chaste in the merely intellective level, and even within the twentieth or thirtieth subconscious levels, failed when they were subjected to esoteric ordeals within the more profound levels of the subconsciousness. Someone may not be a thief in the merely rational level and even within forty-eight subconscious levels, and nonetheless be a thief within the forty-ninth level.
So, acknowledge that the defects are multifaceted, and that some very holy individuals can be frighteningly perverse in the deepest levels of their subconsciousness. It is by means of esoteric ordeals that the initiates discover themselves, and failures in those ordeals point to, indicate, the diverse, false psychological states within which we find ourselves abiding.
Question: Venerable Master, can you tell us how we bachelors and bachelorettes can perform this work?
Samael Aun Weor: Respectable ladies and gentlemen, the spear of Eros, the holy spear, can always be handled by Devi-Kundalini, our own particular Cosmic Divine Mother. Nevertheless, there is a difference between married people and single people, since the spear has a much more superior electrical power when it is handled during the sexual trance. Yet, the spear possesses a marvelous, but inferior power, when it is utilized without the erotic trance.
Bachelors and bachelorettes can also progress, even though their work will be a little slower. However, when they get married, their work will become stronger, more powerful in the complete sense of the word.
Bachelors and bachelorettes can progress until a certain point profoundly defined by nature. Beyond this limit, it is not possible for them to progress without sexual magic.